Winners Never Quit… Quitters Never Win!

My life is so far from going to plan right now… I had 2 days of calling around French people for some accommodation only to be told I need a French Guarantor, by the time I actually organised it and paid for the pleasure, I found out that Student Finance England (being the stellar organisation that they are) have messed up my loan for the THIRD year running. So I give them my greatest congratulations because it is looking like I won’t be going on my year abroad thanks to them.

I cannot afford my rent once I’m in France, I couldn’t pay any bills and I certainly won’t be able to afford to eat! So I think the Plan B will have to be to intermit until next year. It’s not exactly something I want to do, but perhaps spending the next year working, I will be in a better place emotionally and financially in order to complete my final two years at university. I cannot even begin to describe just how utterly devastated I am, the disappointment is surreal… It is however, very typical of my luck and is just another hurdle I will have to climb.

So in light of how stressful this week has been, to the point where my hair has even started to fall out, I have decided to keep going. Whilst I may have to postpone my Year Abroad, I refuse to be defeated. I will work and save up money, train hard, improve my running and get straight back at it again when university starts up!

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When I look back at my life it has never been easy; my childhood was a confusing babble of arguments and older siblings going off the rails a bit for various reasons… My mum had several medical problems such as a bleed on the brain and a suspected clot in her lungs. As a result if these issues she was taken into hospital (on separate occasions) and because my dad had to work, it came to me to pick up the slack. I am always happy to do this because it’s my family and those are the things you do for family but it did also mean that I had to grow up quite quickly.

When I was 17 I had an operation to rectify my own medical issues which only added to the stress I was under at the time, having just started 6th Form. After a long hard slog it was finally results day and I found out that I had not got into university…. Execute Plan B: I did an extra year at 6th Form and finally, got into university.

By this point I had been diagnosed with depression and began having problems with Student Finance but fortunately, these were quickly seen to. Unfortunately I had put on 2 stone in weight in this time and getting it off was so hard. During my 2nd year of uni, I had many problems with my flatmate and was again diagnosed with depression and given counselling. Here it was established that my mental age is around 27 years old… 6 years older than my chronological age.  I don’t believe this makes me better or worse a person than anyone else.

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I have had many problems and the ones I am facing now are just the latest, somehow I doubt they will be the last. But if I ever want to get anywhere in life then I must not quit, because like title of this post says:

WINNERS NEVER QUIT AND QUITTERS NEVER WIN!!

 

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